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Once I’ve washed my hair, you’re not allowed to cancel.

The plans were casual. The hair wash was a commitment. Cancel while I’m still on the sofa? Lovely. Cancel after the shampoo, conditioner and full blow-dry? We’re going out. Even if it’s just to Tesco. Where’s your point of no return: shower started, outfit on, or already in the taxi? And if you’re secretly delighted when someone cancels, how late can they leave it?

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Once the awkward shoe is on, the plan is happening. A proper reason for cancelling is obviously fine, but “can’t be bothered” after the blow-dry means Tesco is getting the full outfit and absolutely no explanation.

You’ve definitely got an opinion.

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